


The Land Of Falling Letters

by jb_slasher



Series: The Land Of Falling Letters [1]
Category: E.R.
Genre: Episode Related, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-01-17
Updated: 2003-01-17
Packaged: 2017-10-25 18:19:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 399
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/273316
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jb_slasher/pseuds/jb_slasher
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Carter takes his place. (set during, Episode S08E20: "The Letter")</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Land Of Falling Letters

He feels sad and pained, when he tries to read the letter aloud without his voice diminishing. He can't cry, not now, not in front of these people, who suddenly seem like strangers to him. He tells Frank to put the letter on the board and leaves.

He walks into the bar, sees his co-workers. He's told Abby's outside. He goes, sees her, drunk. He is overpowered by the feeling that he has to help. He has to do it to heal his own pain. He tries to get her to leave for the AA meeting. She bites him, literally, as he carries her, and he drops her. They go to get some coffee.

He's fetched from the coffee shop by Chen to check on his patient. First barely breathing, then no pulse, and again revived. He hears the silent plea. _No more shocks..._ He knows he has to let go. The time is nearing.

He walks into the lounge. Susan's crying. They talk, and hug. They are walked in on, and they break away quickly. Susan steps outside, Weaver heads for the lockers, and he sits down. The limping doctor starts emptying Doctor Mark Greene's locker. They talk, Weaver breaks, and he's suddenly alone again. He looks after her, rises, and walks to the locker.

He has been here eight years, the longest time any other doctor has. They expect him to replace Mark Greene, the man they all loved, the man he still loves. He swallows against the lump in his throat, and finishes emptying the locker. He comes across Mark's stethoscope, and hangs it around his neck.

Gallant feels sick. Déjà vu, from eight years ago. He smiles a little to himself, walks after Gallant, outside. It's like a flashback, only now the roles have changed, he's Mark and Gallant's John. He gives Gallant the exact same speech as Mark gave him those eight treasured years ago, only without the Benton bits. Benton's already gone. Gallant doesn't even know.

It's Mr. Ervin, Mark's former patient. He is Doctor John Carter, the reborn Mark Greene, treating his patient, who trusts the Mark he's seen as. He stays with Mr. Ervin, listening to the words, remembering, missing the real Mark Greene. He imagines his patient as Mark, imagines the things he could say, but what he really never gets to say. John swallows hard, struggling to let go.


End file.
